I have missed blogs on the past couple commandments, but this week I pick up on the seventh commandment.
The Scripture reading for Sunday is Exodus 20:14 (“You shall not commit adultery”) and Matthew 5:27-32.
During his presidential campaign, presidential candidate Jimmy Carter agreed to an interview with (of all magazines) Playboy. He was criticized for agreeing to an interview with such a magazine, but that was only the start of it. During the interview, Jimmy Carter made a startling admission that raised the eyebrows of many in the media. In a somewhat unsolicited comment, Jimmy Carter said, “The Bible says, ‘Thou shalt not commit adultery.’ Christ said, I tell you that anyone who looks on a woman with lust has in his heart already committed adultery. I've looked on a lot of women with lust. I've committed adultery in my heart many times.... This is something that God recognizes, that I will do and have done, and God forgives me for it.”
After that comment he went on to describe his inability to judge another person’s adultery because he was guilty of the same sin in the heart, but the “damage” was done. Those in the media couldn’t handle such a bold comment from a presidential-candidate. Presidential candidates (and the president) were expected to act, behave, and talk in a certain way and Jimmy Carter’s forthright admission didn’t fall within those bounds.
But there is a refreshing truth to Jimmy Carter’s comments. Jesus said that any man who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart (and by extension, any woman who looks at a man lustfully has already committed adultery with him in her heart). By Jesus’ definition, adultery isn’t only an action; it’s a thought, a desire, an escape in our mind. Adultery is something that we are all guilty of.
In Exodus 20:14 God commands “You shall not commit adultery.” He commands this because he knows what adultery does to us. He knows the pain it causes, the relationships it ruins, the ongoing effects. He created marriage to be a union between husband and wife where two become one. Adultery – even adultery in the heart – breaks that bond.
One of the dangers in a marriage (or any relationship) is that the both parties often expect the other person to satisfy them, fulfill them, and meet their every need. This can often lead to negative feelings toward the other person, and a “need” to find someone to meet the criteria that the other person isn’t meeting. But, there is a major problem with this philosophy: there is no man or woman for us who can fill all the empty places in our hearts (contrary to what TV shows, movies, and books like to tell us). Chasing passion or romance or excitement won’t fulfill the desires of our hearts to love and be loved fully in return. There is only one Satisfier, and that is the Lord our God.
Only His love can fill the empty spaces in our hearts, satisfy us, fulfill us, and meet our needs. When we turn to Jesus to be our Satisfier, and not our spouse, or boyfriend, or girlfriend, His love enables us to stop searching for love in places that bring destruction, ruin, and regret into our relationships. His love frees us to love our spouse (or our future spouse) for who they are and for who God made them to be.